Comments on: Should “productivity” play a role in your friendships and relationships?

By: Sonia Simone

Sonia Simone — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 19:18:37 +0000

I see this as just being conscious about relationships, which I find very valuable. I have a tendency to spend time with the people who do the most follow-up, or who are the most convenient to be around, versus the people I really want to be with. Completely agree that just because a person has become a “habit” does not mean that spending time with that person is the right way to be spending your time.

By: Ahson Wardak

Ahson Wardak — Thu, 04 Sep 2008 14:42:18 +0000

I think the key with relationships is not productivity (or efficiency), it’s effectiveness. Often times, you can have 100s of ways to keep track of friends. If it’s automated and dry, not genuine, then you’ll, ironically, be very lonely.

If I were you, I would focus on writing a post on how having great relationships with others actually helps you be productive. Generally, happy, friendly people do better at life and getting things done. Relationships and productivity may not be concurrent things, but they can aid each other.

I definitely want to see a post on how being happy in relationships means that you’ll have a tendency to be more productive.

By: Productivity in Relationships » a link to an interesting article about nurturing relationships (Sunshine and Merriment by Xee Momma)

Wed, 27 Aug 2008 08:54:02 +0000

[...] In short, I do what I need to so I can spend quality time with the people I care about. I call this …. About the Blogger [...]

By: Jared Goralnick

Jared Goralnick — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 20:29:22 +0000

Scratches Elizabeth off To-Call List…

Just kidding :-). I totally see your point. Maybe it’s semantics, I don’t know.

A REAL FRIEND is more than someone with two eyes and a heart. A real friend (one that makes the list ;-) ) does trump ‘most everything else. But sometimes we think that ALL PEOPLE are more deserving of our time than whatever non-people-related activities we have. It just helps me sometimes to either think through who I spend time with or revisit what other priorities I have.

I hope my explanations help a little…as opposed to “alienating.” I really appreciate your comment.

By: Elizabeth

Elizabeth — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 19:39:49 +0000

I think my criticism, of the last blog post and of this one, stems simply from a different point of view. We participate in activities within relationships, such as making phone calls and visiting, and I completely agree with your perspective on using time wisely with respect to those activities. But you call friends here “an activity with two eyes and a heart.” I don’t see relationships themselves as activities or hobbies. And I think viewing them as such discounts their complexity and emotional content. Perhaps it’s semantics, but this notion really doesn’t sit well with me. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t stop wasting time interacting with people who don’t improve your life – my internal system for this is just based in my heart, not my head – and it’s not something I put on my to do list. It seems like a subtle difference, but I think it’s what makes this blog post either validating or alienating.

Thanks for the food for thought! And the tips for staying in touch.

By: @Stephen

@Stephen — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 16:37:16 +0000

Thanks, I am looking forward to it. I have some big ideas and am really excited about sharing them.

By: Jared Goralnick

Jared Goralnick — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 15:40:48 +0000

I've heard a bit about Gitomer's book, and I'm certainly a fan of Carnegie's classic. I'll be very curious to see what you have to say over at Productivity in Context about all this stuff once your day job is over. Congratulations on moving to web work and writing full time, Stephen!

By: @Stephen

@Stephen — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 15:11:57 +0000

I believe that Productivity principles *should* be applied to relationships. Jeff Gitomer has written a book about these principles that I highly recommend, with actionable steps for improving and strengthening your relationships.

As soon as my contract is up on my “day job”, I will begin aggressively applying these principles, and writing about it!

By: Productivity in Context » Blog Archive » Productivity Practices and Relationships

Tue, 26 Aug 2008 15:09:34 +0000

[...] work. I had a little time this morning and wanted to share with you an interesting post by Jared at Technotheory.com – Should “productivity” play a role in your friendships and relationships? When it comes to friendships and relationships, is it fair to apply principles of productivity…or [...]